We live a limited life with nearly unlimited possibilities. Yet we sit complacent in our hum-ho lives with fear and trepidation to go beyond what we know, and beyond what our minds tell us we can do.
You don't know when your last day on this earth will be. Perhaps you'll get an illness like my mom and gradually decline, knowing the end is coming. Or perhaps you'll just not live to see the next morning unexpectedly. Or feel okay one moment and then faint and then leave us as Lorrie, formerly The Token Fat Girl, did. I am not even going to begin to act like I really knew Lorrie beyond the words and photos on her blog, but her impact on my life has been immense. She was one of the first “weight loss” bloggers I read when I was at my lowest point (and highest weight). She was gorgeous, honest, and her genuine nature shined through the monitor. She showed off her plus size fashion and sense of style. She was an artist and made jewelry. She created her own design business and lived on her own terms with her loving husband and friends. She shared, and so I shared. Without sharing, I don't know how I would have found my voice. I've met so many people who have changed my life from sharing. And she is one reason I started.
Again, I can't even begin to experience her passing as anyone remotely close to her (see Miranda's post here), but once again she has provided an important lesson – an unfortunate reminder of mortality.
Seeing a parent die is one thing, but experiencing someone your age pass completely unexpectedly is a different type of experience. It highlights the precious nature of our lives and how we can't live a life full of “what ifs'.”
- What if we were kinder to each other?
- What if we were kinder to ourselves?
- What if we stopped wasting time on people who are negative?
- Less snark, more support.
- Have we showed gratitude for everything in our lives, and have we made efforts to change those things that we aren't as happy with?
Life is so much more than healthy food, workouts, paychecks and play dates. It's so much more than living in the routine you've built for yourself and thinking “this is it.” Life is about feeling vibrant and being able to do what you want to with the mind and body you have. I'm not there yet. I've always said that is where I'm trying to get. I am not sure the timing of when I'll get there, but it's something to continue pushing for.
I hate when we talk about “fighting” for something because when it comes to trying to change ourselves, it seems like we're disregarding who we are right now in hopes of being some better version of ourselves in the future. Don't fight yourself, and don't fight others. Just make a promise to make the best choices you can that will leave a legacy.
At the end of the day, you want to say “I feel good with today” and truly mean it. Did you share your day with people who lift you up instead of tear you down? Did you do your best to accomplish whatever goal you're working on? Did you take the time to dream a little bigger and beyond the small part of the world that you live in?
We aren't guaranteed anything in this life. Don't we owe it to ourselves to live it on the terms that will make us and the people around us insanely satisfied?
Dream big. Screw the critics – including that voice inside your head. Live and love.
I don't often throw around the saying “I'm praying for you,” but I am praying for Lorrie's husband, family, and friends who had the wonderful pleasure of having her in their lives, and the immense hole she has left. She impacted those she knew “in real life” as well as those of us online silent admirers. Her gifts will not be forgotten.
