I can't believe July is over. July of 2013 was a time of such big changes, and the past 12 months feel like I've been slowly crawling back to normalcy – whatever that is! This sounds more dramatic than it really was, but it was still really challenging physically and mentally.
My surgery to repair a tear in my posterior tibial tendon was last July. I never had surgery and was a lot more worried than I admitted. That being said, I was so incredibly frustrated at the previous YEARS of unresolved pain after the half marathon I did. After being on my crazy knee-scooter for several weeks, I had to re-learn how to walk on that side of my body. It had been years since I walked regularly and equally on both legs. I went through 3 months of physical therapy and honestly was so frustrated. Nothing felt like it was healing. My surgeon suggested it was my weight – talk about a complete mental breakdown. When I was scheduled to get another MRI to see if something was still wrong, I also started with a new physical therapist – several months after concluding my last relatively unsuccessful sessions before. The PT came strongly recommended by several people at my gym, so I figured instead of the cost of another MRI, it wouldn't hurt to try more PT for at least a few sessions. It was a TOTAL game changer. I will never be able to say enough good things about James Escaloni at Kort Physical Therapy. He treated me as someone independent of weight, and the progress I made was honestly amazing. Just 2 weeks ago, I “graduated” from physical therapy. I still have a little pain and swelling, but I know how to control it, and am totally equipped with the tools I need to strengthen my ankle, leg, and core. Most importantly, I feel like my mobility will be back to “normal” in the future – something I had serious doubts about before.
Hashimotos and Gluten Free
Right before my surgery, I was diagnosed with Hashimotos, an autoimmune thyroid disease. I started thyroid medication (natural vs. synthetic) and eliminated gluten from my diet. It's been 1 year since I've eaten gluten intentionally. There have been 2 interactions that I've had unintentionally: 1 with some beans last week, and 1 with an almond-crusted fish I was told was gluten free from the restaurant until I was nearly done with it and they came to apologize. I feel like my energy has been better since I came out of my cast. I had quite a bit of depression around the immobility that I think pushed my energy down. I do feel a little better though. It's just something to continue managing as best as possible.
Letting Go of Skinny
Also last July, I rebranded this blog from Skinny Emmie to Authentically Emmie. I have to say it's been such a relief to not feel the pressure to talk about my weight day in and day out because of the word “skinny.” It just really messed with my head. I feel much better about just expressing myself as I am, in this moment, at whatever weight. Someone asked me recently on Instagram if I've lost weight, and I honestly replied that I don't know. My feet haven't touched the scale in months. I'm just not in the headspace to resist falling into a tailspin if I see a number I don't like. I'm working through that mental mess daily. In the meantime, I've been working on expanding my confidence through fashion, which you've obviously seen a lot of lately from me!
It's been a heck of a year. Bring it on, August!
Thanks for hanging on with me during the ride!