Today I present to you a combination of emotional baggage sprinkled with truth and a dusting of humility. (No, you won’t find the recipe on Pinterest.)
Last night while I was busy dancing without pain in my sassy pants, I felt invincible. The burden of 14 months knocked out of my recently-embraced fitness routine had been lifted with one high five from the physical therapist. I successfully leaped over the tallest hurdle in my weight loss journey, and was ready to sprint to the finish line. Pretty much felt like hot shit.
I’ve got photos of me all over this website and my fashion website. I’m in all kinds of outfits and in my skivvies showing my weight loss progress (and conversely, the distance I still have left to cover). There are days when I feel like a completely disgusting ogre, and days that I feel like a pretty pretty princess. *insert girly twirl here*
Today, I saw a photo of me from a few weeks ago. In a millisecond, I gasped and fell into a pit of self-deprecation and loathing.
Blah. I wallowed in my “woe is me” land for a little bit, both because of my “girth” in the photo and because of the awful bag choice (didn’t have time to switch before I ran out to the event). Of course my defenses cried “bad camera angle!” But still, if someone is standing at this angle, that is how they would see me. It just is what it is.
That’s what calmed me down: It is what it is.
Whether it’s my perception or bad camera angle or reality, it is what it is. This photo can’t take away 113 pounds gone from my body. It can’t take away 5k’s, kettlebells, Zumba, or a half-marathon. My accomplishments are still the same, no matter how my head processes the image above.
Onward and downward.
PS: In the photo, I’m talking to author Cynthia Ellingsen of THE WHOLE PACKAGE (affiliate link). It’s a super fun read, and I highly recommend!
