(This was originally going to be a #TransparentTuesday post, but in a miracle of miracles, I got really sleepy at a decent hour and went to bed. It was glorious.)
Oh friends. It's been a rough several weeks in this noggin of mine, trying to wrestle with stress, anxiety, depression, negative self talk, obligations, and sheer exhaustion. I will share more when I can
(seriously, this vague *ish is for the birds), but for now, I'm just dealing with lemons (Edit: these are the lemons). It feels like I've been sliding off a cliff and just trying to hang on however possible. Rocks are falling around me and there's a lack of stability.
To try to slow the spiral, I've been searching for center. Here are my recent attempts:
Finish a nagging task
I was obsessed with painting my bedroom and hanging new blinds, which I ordered too small (and they're non refundable). So I fixated on that task for a bit while trying every tool in my tool box to find something to take some stupid screws down with. It was a good distraction. (I'll cover my decor transformations later if anyone is interested). I finally finished removing and installing all 4 new blinds and getting the pile of tools out of my bedroom.
Declutter all the things
All.the.things – I want to get rid of them (well, most of them.) When a friend on Facebook started a 40 day decluttering challenge, I hopped in. The goal is to donate or throw out at least 10 items per day. So the purging of the junk is happening in my house right now. I have to admit, for all the grunt work that it is: it feels damn good.
Focus energy on others
Instead of continuing my hibernation streak, I spent some time last weekend volunteering with an amazing organization called Be Bold, run by an amazing woman here in Lexington. It's a day long workshop for young women to learn how our bodies are not our currency, despite what is depicted in the media. It was a powerful day to see how a group of dedicated volunteers work all year to put on this event for a day that so many girls benefit from. Bonus – gave me a reason to be back on UK's campus. It always feels a little like home. And it was the first day of Starbucks red cup!
Move if and when you can
(or as my friends Carla and Roniw say: #wycwyc) There have been way too many 3 or 4 hour nights of sleep the past 6 weeks or so, and that meant sometimes my Tues/Thurs gym sessions were hard to get to. I'm valuing sleep over workouts right now, but I am finally to a point (thank you time change!) where my sleep is getting back on track, so I sleepily made it there Tuesday and we did one of my favorite things, chain bridge finishers. The leaf raking is also keeping me active. I have way too many mature trees in my yard.
Allow people to lift you up
I've had to tell friends to come rescue me if I disappear for more than a week. Nothing drastic, mind you, but making me get out of the house to do something fun or to give me a call if we haven't talked in a while. I'm proactively trying to head off any hermit habits that I know I fall back into that lead to self-destructive behaviors.